Dark thoughts on a stormy morning. Anger and frustration at feelings unexplained. Frustration at a world that seams to value emotions and faith over reason.
These thoughts are mine this morning, and only mine. I am not expecting you to understand them, but it is enough for you to read them.
I think I have been keeping to myself for to long, not expressing myself enough. I went out with friends last night and found I was drifting from them. I was lacking any new news or expressions to share with them. Because I missed a party due to work and a cold I was teased about coming last night, which wasn't why I was there and even though I was expecting it, it still stung. I guess my tolerance for bullshit is at a low currently, the result of emotional rawness that comes from over work. The same thing effected me last year and it is distressing to see it return so early in the year.
I have to get over it in order to do what I want to do, get past the emotional disappointments and panicky fear and physical setbacks. It is that or admit I need to let loose another branch of my life, something I don't want to do now.
Wednesday, March 10, 2010
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